Oh my. South Africa, I really worry about you. Or more so, I really worry about your people (including myself).

I often read the Thought Leader (you should too) which offers the opinions of a wide range intelligent and capable individuals. Probably the most interesting part of the columns is the comments that follow, usually in the form of a heated debate. I love this. I think it’s healthy.

The only problem is that so many of the pieces centre on racism. It never stops – black this, white that. And the comments comprise of the ranting and raving of some very intelligent racists – there is no debate, there is just shouting. It’s become so bad that I almost want to take a break from the site.

How are we meant to build up a nation that spends so much of its time trying to bring each other down? The race-card is getting us nowhere, and fast.

So anyway, there might be love (oh, whom I kidding, it’s definitely lust) in the air.

Don’t act so surprised. I am actually quite likeable.

Unfortunately, however, there are some obstacles to this rendezvous:

1.       BFG (let just call him that as it describes him quite nicely) works for my father.

2.       My father’s offices are at home. I live at home (don’t judge me).

3.       I am volatile and dramatic. Needless to say I have less than amicable break ups.

4.       BFG is 6’4”, I am 5’3” (I find this more amusing than problematic).

Oh, what to do?

Ah, fuck it, I can’t think rationally here – it’s been a long, dry season.

How do you get rid of temptation? You yield to it. Fantastic, problem solved. Thanks for all your help.

(Sorry dad!)

Fuck. I am useless.

Please someone enlighten me: What feed should I have that is satisfactory to Amatomu? The bloody bastards are incredibly fussy and let me know daily that my feed is not validating:

Sorry

This feed does not validate.

• line 2, column 0: The prefix “media” generally is associated with the namespace “http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/” [help]
  

  <rss version="2.0"
  

In addition, interoperability with the widest range of feed readers could be improved by implementing the following recommendation.

• line 120, column 0: style attribute contains potentially dangerous content: text-indent:-0.25in;margin:0 0 0 0.5in; (17 occurrences) [help]
  

  <p class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="text-indent:-0.25in;margin:0 0 0 ...
  

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?!!?!

It’s incredibly mean of them, especially since they offer no assistance to a computer idiot like me.

I had to have a margarita last night due to this debacle. It was bloody disappointing. This has upset me immensely.

Please. Someone has got to help me. The margaritas aren’t going to.

Oh my god. I have finally worked out how this whole RSS feed thingy works. It’s taken me days, I am not exaggerating. And I thought I was computer literate. Uh… no.

At least now all my many (detect the note of sarcasm) fans can subscribe to my feed. Oh how lucky you all are.

Seriously, this has made my day.

In my previous post, I referred to climbing mountains. Huh? Yes, I hear you:

Climbing mountains, most of you would say, why on earth would you do that?  There are cable cars for such things! And what about the muggers?!  the South Africans would scream. Why not just sip a margarita while looking at a mountain instead? (In South Africa, it is not uncommon to get mugged while hiking up our mountains. Our criminals are partial to fresh air and find it most enjoyable to work outdoors, weather permitting of course).

And I agree with your sentiments.

Nevertheless, it comes so highly recommended by all these nature-loving, environmentally-friendly, awfully nice people. So, I thought hell, I like to try out new things, maybe I should give it a go (and it’s on my list) so last Saturday I set out with 4 of my wonderful lady friends (who needs men anyway?) to climb Lion’s Head.

I enjoyed it. And I have to say, there are many advantages to climbing a mountain that I feel necessary to share with you:

1.       It works the hell out of your ass (I found it difficult to sit for the next few days but I loved every moment of it)

2.       You can do it even when there is load-shedding (Foreigners, load-shedding is a South African phenomenon whereby our electricity provider, Eskom, provides power outages on purpose. They forgot that South Africa is a developing country and neglected to consider the possibility of growth and a higher demand of electricity in the future. But don’t worry, we have a timetable so we are never caught unaware – awfully kind of them)

3.       Fit, bare-chested men run up the mountains for you to watch at leisure (Who knew you could run up a mountain?)

4.       Crazy foreigners provide all sorts of entertainment: their attire (either looking as if they are about to go have tea at the Mount Nelson, or in full on safari gear), their mannerisms (Boyfriends carrying their girlfriends’ handbags while hiking) or the way in which they refuse to put any sun tan lotion on and turn a lovely lobster red.

5.       Oh, and the views of course:

All in all, it was a lovely, criminal-free, active and entertaining morning.

Just to let you know that besides committing myself to learning about the stock market, joining a boot camp (absolute madness but also extremely fun: BMF – you should try it), reading the classics, writing this blog, climbing mountains and understanding men, I am also going to learn how to take an excellent photograph. In fact, my course starts tonight and soon I shall be a famous photographer. I might also make some new friends and possibly meet the man of my dreams in the process.

This is all very exciting. I think I need a margarita to calm me down.

I have great news. I think that some of my shares may actually be making me a profit in the not too distant future. Yes, please don’t laugh, I know I should have been making a profit from the beginning but hey, I am still learning. And believe me, even if you read every financial market textbook there is, engage in technical/fundamental and value analysis, you will still get it wrong some of the time. Just like we do with relationships. Actually, as far as I can tell, the JSE and men* have a lot in common:

1.          They both have hidden costs: When buying shares on the JSE, you also incur brokerage fees, STRATE fees etc, which, if you are new to this, can take you by quite surprise! (Incidentally, this is why I have been incurring losses – due to not being able to trade with copious amounts of cash, every little cost counts). Men, on the other hand, have more complicated costs that you may not be aware of when you first enter into a relationship – he might have disagreeable friends, be married to golf, enjoy a few too many too frequently, or (God forbid!), he might be disappointing in more intimate circumstances! Costs of the JSE and men occur when you have already made a substantial investment and cannot easily pull out without incurring more costs.

2.          They are both unpredictable: The JSE tends to get easily influenced by the investors’ feelings. As a result, it can be extremely volatile and some times not act in the way you would expect, as some other investors’ may have different feelings to yours. Alternatively, men are inexplicably unpredictable – sometimes influenced by their friends, sometimes by their family and sometimes by you. You just never know which way he is going to go. Both shares and men may end up disappointing you for no satisfactory explanation and there is absolutely nothing you can do about this.

3.          They are both High Risk, High Return: As many of you might know, the JSE is a high risk investment that can ultimately offer you the greatest return in comparison to other investment options such as cash or bonds. In the same breath however, you can luck out, and incur all the risk without any of the return. It depends very much on your choice of shares and your reasons for investing in them. Similarly, men are a high risk, high return asset (in comparison to pets, a good book or a slab of chocolate). Unfortunately, many of us get it wrong initially: so eager to get into the market, we invest in the wrong man, incur hidden costs and leave the relationship with negative returns usually made up of heartbreak, insecurity and lack of self respect. This results from a lack of comprehensive analysis due to love being ‘blind’. But luckily, most of us learn, and further attempts involve intelligent investing where we are rewarded with high returns, even when there are hidden costs. Both good men and good shares are worth waiting for.

So my investor friends, be careful of what or who you invest in and most importantly, don’t rush into anything. Be patient , have a margarita, and you might just be greatly rewarded.

*I do not deny that this blog could be similarly applied to women. But it is really so much more fun comparing it to men – besides isn’t investing in the stock markets a very manly thing to do? A good comparison, indeed.

Recently, I have given myself the task of reading the classics, or at least some of them. I started with Jane Eyre (by Charlotte Bronte) and have recently finished it, although I wish this was not the case – it really was a wonderful read.

A love story, of course, that involves all the required elements: the protagonist, her dream man, a lot of adversity, with a little adventure and, of course, another woman. But, I think, what I like most about the book is that it also provides a history lesson of life in the early 19^th century. Oh how things have changed! Sex and swear words are not even alluded to! – Which I have to say, is so welcomed. And although a woman’s role was inherently more submissive back then, there was no lack of self-respect (at least of the characters of this story).

And this got me thinking.

Ironically, many women today, who are substantially more empowered, seem to have lost their self-respect while marching down the road of feminism. Ladies, why do so many of you think that feminism implies that you should sleep around? Doing this does not empower you; it just brings you down to the level that many men find themselves on. Is this the type of equality you strive for? I hope not.

Do yourselves a favour and read Jane Eyre – we all have much to learn from her.

I am kinda an emotional wreck at the moment. Things just aren’t fantastic in my life today. My dog has just died.

Lovely.

God, its hard to grow up.

You know, as much as I like to be single and as much as I am happy at the moment,  I still worry that this single life is ultimately not for me.

And, no, this does not mean to say that a single life is unfulfilling or wrong – there are many single people out there that are happy and remain happy. Rather, I am not sure that I am one of them.

As Charlotte Bronte says in Jane Eyre, ‘A human being must love something’, I know with every inch of being that I need to love something, or rather someone, in order to be truly happy.

There is nothing better, to me, to love and be loved. So yes, at times, I worry about being single.